Tigers

I'm baaaaack! (I hope you're hearing this in your head like in Poltergeist...b/c if not, you might be too young to read this blog!).

I'm not much of a blogger...but I've been reading a ton of blogs, and convinced my friend "hawaiigirlalways" that she should blog her deals & steals. Since she's doing it at DODO, I guess it's my turn to go for it here.

I started out this blog just for knitting stuff, but since it's already set up, I'm just going to go for it & use it for whatever comes up. I dunno if I have much to say that people will care about, but I figure I'll at least excercise my "writing muscles" for a bit when I post. We'll see how it goes with this, my first opinion piece...

Tiger Moms/tiger kids

A few months ago, my Dad sent me and my siblings an article about "tiger moms". I have to admit, I mostly skimmed the article because it was really annoying me that while a new book on the topic was inciting much controversy, at the same time it was also gaining a ton of free publicity. I am not going to name said book here because I don't want to add to the publicity. In a nutshell, while there are supporters of militantly strict, overbearing and, imho, cruel parenting resulting in overachieving offspring, the question bears asking:
How many of the same kids end up
1) in therapy?
2) rebelling against and/or alienating their pushy parents?
3) socially maladjusted?
4) all of the above?

But I'm sure we won't hear about those kids. At least not until they "go postal" and massacre a bunch of their co-workers or fellow students (to be fair, I won't mention specific cases for these--they don't deserve added publicity either).

Here's the thing: I'm not going to spout off a bunch of research statistics, but I am going to cite, using my 4 siblings and I for real life data, why I think so-called tiger parenting is a bunch of malarkey. At the same time, I'm thanking our parents for raising us the way they did, and for the most part, breaking the mold of "typical" Chinese immigrant parents (notice I used a T-word other than the name of an orange, striped jungle creature). We turned out just fine, and I think they should be quite proud.

So here are some of the characteristics of that T-parenting, according to that article:

No play dates or sleepovers:
Why not? It's good to have friends, and in my experience, a sleepover here or there really helped me to appreciate my home life as compared to those of some of my friends'.

No school plays/extracurricular sports or activities:
I can't even count the number of plays and musicals we participated in both at school and our local children's theater. Two of my siblings even started the music group at our church (I think they learned to play guitar from Dad...or maybe Joan Baez), and all five us sang in it at various times for years. School choir was a given for most of us, and three of us participated in high school drill team/marching band, going on to join the UCLA band. Two siblings even performed in the Olympics Opening Ceremonies with the band.

No sports you can't medal in:
Sports taught us the value of teamwork, commitment, practice, and sportsmanship. Two of my siblings did compete at the junior nationals level, but our choices in athletics were just that--our choices--no ulterior medal accumulating motives were put forth explicitly nor implicitly by Mom & Dad. We played mostly after-school sports, and some AYSO soccer. In addition, both spectator and participatory sports such as skiing and backyard football games were major family pastimes that we all enjoyed together.

There was one stipulation that did influence what activities we could participate in: regularly scheduled practices, performances, lessons or games could not interfere with dinner time. Dinner time was sacred family time. There was no TV (unless it was Monday night football when the entire meal was relocated to the TV room), and telephone interruptions were cut as short as possible. When we finally got an answering machine, sometimes we just let it answer for us. I have learned to appreciate those family dinners, and the close-knit family that they helped build. When I was growing up, I figured that all families had the same nightly "Leave It To Beaver" style dinners. Apparently not, but that's another topic for another day.

An A- is a bad grade:
It's not a bad grade if it's the best that you can do and you gave your best effort. However, I heard my share of "If it's an 'A' then why isn't it an 'A+'?" Ok, that's pretty pushy parenting, but that being said, we definitely did not get "straight A's" all the time, but how's this for academics for five kids:
5 bachelor degrees plus one double-major, one minor, and one master's degree and teaching credential from UC Davis, Stanford University & UCLA.

When all is said and done, I'd say that my siblings and I turned out just fine. We are all well-functioning, well-rounded, and contributing members of our communities. We have good relationships with our non-T parents, and I for one would never blame them for not pushing me hard enough. I choose instead, to thank them for letting me choose a path that was right for me.

What do you think of so-called Tiger parenting?

For this, I will blog!

I found a link to this on ravelry.com and just had to post it. A girl after my own heart! I presently have 3 rolls of duct tape in my drawer: silver, clear, and purple!....I'd just like to know how she got all that sticky tape residue off her fingers and her knitting needles.



On another note, 5 of my closest friends (which includes 3 sisters) and I will spend my birthday at Disneyland in a few weeks! It's the first trip in years where I haven't had my travel knitting planned before the plane tickets were purchased. In fact, I wasn't even planning on bringing knitting into the park...until I found a couple of Ravelry groups talking about knitting and all things Disney. I decided on something easy and small, which turns out to also be a stashbuster (I'm already spending enough $$ on the trip!): preemie caps. I can't think of a better place to knit some happy thoughts into the teeny little hats. I picked up up a pair of teeny weeny sock needles (9" circs) from my lys, where Sue suggested that I definitely wanted to bring bamboo vs. metal into the park for "safety" concerns. Good idea! I may have to save the decrease sections at the top of the hats for some other time, as it might be tough to keep track of the dpns & the yarn needle while in line for rides!

Ball Winder Unwrapped!

Have you ever wondered...?

I'm one of those people who always wonders how things work. I just LOVE the TV show by the same name, even though it's a little tough to knit while watching it :-)The problem is, I'm great at taking things apart, and not so great at getting them back together.

So...when my ball winder developed a squeak, I asked my 2 most mechanically inclined friends--who also happen to be fascinated by my yarn baller--if they could try to get rid of the squeak. They both work on computer hardware and systems and I know they're systematic and meticulous, so I figured I could trust them. Disassembly, de-squeaking, and reassembly took a while, and turned out to be a little more challenging than they thought it would be. There was some nervous laughing, and I had to look away. I was a little scared, to tell the truth.

The happy ending is that all is reassembled (look ma, no extra parts left over!!), and there is no more squeak! For the record, we used the WD-40 pen to lubricate the insides, and gave it a good wipe-down afterward so as not to unnecessarily lubricate any yarn being wound.

In case anyone else wonders what goes on inside the miraculous ball winder, I took a few photos to share with you:

 

Whew!!

 

Ta Daaaaa! Introducing my Barbara Walker Learn-to-Knit Afghan! How's that for a mouthful?

I learned about this afghan from a knitalong group on yahoo groups back in 2004...which was also back when (nostalgia coming up)....

...I'd been knitting for less than a year. If I recall correctly, I was dying to start LTKA, but made myself wait until after the 2004 holiday knitting was completed.

...There was no ravelry, so I can't remember what I knit and there are no photos, but if I look in my knitting notebook, I bet I'd find a whole list, with one page devoted to each yarn label, with info on whom the object the knitted for, what size needles were used, where the yarn was purchased, and when it was started & finished. [Hey Jess & Casey--you guys did everything I was doing!!] Oh, and there's also a scrap of yarn taped to each project page.

...I had to spend more time documenting and less time knitting back then, obviously.

...I was still single, so I had more time to spend doing all that knitting & documenting.

...I wasn't sure if I'd actually finish it, so thought I'd be "safe" by "investing" less than $50 on all acrylic Red Heart Super Saver and Walmart Homestay yarn just in case in just became stash in my closet

...I didn't even have a stash closet.

...I had not discovered that wool, even if it makes me scratch when I wear it, can be really nice to knit with (A quote here from my friend AkamaiKnitter "You really should try knitting with natural yarn.")

...I had not discovered the convenience of interchangeable knitting needle sets, and so amassed a collection of "singles".

Sigh, if I only knew then what I knew now.

I actually managed to knit the squares in about 2 years' time, while I was dating my now husband, and then planning our wedding, plus knitting lots of other stuff on the side. While I was completing square 61 or so, I occurred to me "Crap! I wonder if you can actually block acrylic??" Nope. Double crap! Too late to stop now, although those lace squares at the end nearly killed me. So, slightly disheartened, I started trying to "block" the acrylic, which was mostly what people call "killing acrylic", and started crocheting edges on each square. That was a huge task, which got put on a long hiatus (1.5 years long!).

The hibernation finished when mkcarroll announced that Aloha Knitters was invited to show our work at the Honolulu Academy of Arts Family Sunday event on 9/21/08. She was planning on making a few swatches to show different textures in knitting...I just so happened to have 63 of them! While the squares were on display, what better time to work on the dreaded edging after all that time, so...the awesome HawaiiHooker offered to help me do some edges, and while we sat & chatted, we got all but 10 squares edged. The momentum had set in, and guess what I did for the past 9 days? I'm not much of a crocheter, but I even found, and figured how to do a "biscuit edge" as my border. HawaiiHooker even told me to toss the whole blanket in the washing machine & dryer with some fabric softener, and it would help to block up the thing a little...and make it really soft. I was so anxious to see how that worked, I tossed it in last night, even though there's a whole mess of stray ends still waiting to be woven into the back. Ok, so at least it's mostly done!!

I couldn't figure out how to photograph the whole blanket in one shot, so until I get get my photog friend, Tommy, to help me figure that one out, partial shots will have to do. Or, if you have photosynth I tried to put something up. I'm in there as tink, just like in ravelry.

The Article

If anyone's reading this that hasn't gotten an email from me today, the article about the heart hit the Stanford Medical Community today. Here's a link to the newsletter:
Discover SHC.

Travel Knitting

Way back in May when we learned we'd be traveling to California for dh's surgery, but didn't know exactly when yet, I decided to start preparing the one thing I knew for sure: I was going to need a bunch of knitting to help keep me sane and manage my stress levels. Since my husband's surgery and then recovery would be my primary concern, I didn't know if I'd have time to get to any LYSes, so I wanted to make sure I had everything I might need with me. Oh, and with all of the luggage restrictions, I knew I had to pack light so everything would fit in one suitcase. Later, when I learned that we'd be gone for 28 whole days, I felt very sad at the thought of leaving my wonderful yarn closet & stash for so long (I was worried about dh, too, but his stuff was a given--there were no options involved so there was also no need for thinking--just go and do it). I think I put more thought into what I needed for my knitting supplies than I did for anything else on the trip.

Here's what I ended up doing....

 

 

KnitPicks Options Binder vs. the "guts only" version. I used giant stitch markers to hold the pages together, & in a pinch, a few of them could be spared and used on a project, too. Removing the binder really cut down on bulk for traveling. I posted 2 shots so you can see the difference in size and thickness. Now that I'm back home, the pages went right back into the binder for safe-keeping (plus it's easier to find the bulky binder than the little, compact packet in my cluttered house).

After I took this photo, I actually grabbed another empty 2-part sleeve and inserted sizes 0 through 2 sets of 4" sock needles in one compartment, and some of the KnitPicks shorter size 1's. Also used a 1-part sleeve to fit in long KP size 0 in case I wanted to do magic loop, and a couple of other things. I'm not sure why I brought so many sock needles when I didn't bring a single ball of sock yarn, but I basically decided I wanted at least 1 size of needle up to about 11 (the biggest KP Options that I own).

 

The essentials: Patterns, tools, reference book, needles

I chose patterns that I thought I might knit, and made sure duplicates were available online, just in case they got lost. The tools included the usual Chibi needles, measuring tape, KP Options tool & extras, Knit Kards, stitch markers, plane-friendly thread snippers. One thing in there that I love for flying is called the "Grip Clip". It's a reusable & washable adhesive paper holder. The sticky back holds onto things like your airplane tray table (when it's closed), and you slip your pattern in the little slot so you can read it hands-free. You can buy them in singles at stationery stores, or I bought a pack of 4 at The Container Store. btw, if you use a plier and pinch the circle end of the KP Options "key" closed, you can then put it on a key chain or something so you don't constantly lose the little thing. I don't know why they made them open-ended to begin with!

My tool bag is a little pencil case bought from Walmart for about $1. I had another one with me for my "anywhere knitting". In that was a Mason-Dixon Baby Genius burp cloth that I could whip out and knit in waiting rooms, when riding in the car, etc. But after dh got home from the hospital, the only thing I did when riding in the car was try to nap since I was up with him quite a bit at night.

I chose the XRX Knitter's Handbook over my Knitter's Companion for my reference book mainly because of weight. I read somewhere that the Knitter's Companion pages are plastic coated for durability, but that also makes it weigh at ton. I also like the wider variety of material covered in the XRX book and the fact that the wire binding is covered and not prone to bending or snagging things.

 

Yarn for planned projects. Naturally this was the bulkiest part of my stuff. Had I used my space bags, it would have compacted things down quite a bit, but actually, due to my limiting other items, I didn't need to compact any of the yarn. The bottom bag (with pink yarn) is actually yarn for a quite bulky sweater I was making for my little niece. She turned 2 while we were in CA, so I needed to finish it for her birthday gift. The yarn and the sweater were all stashed in a plastic zipper bag that originally held a set of sheets. Those make some great project bags! The top bag had some yarn for other small projects that need to be made for gifts. At the last minute I also threw in my lace knitting project and my socks, which only needed a toe to be completed.

The End Result

I think this happens on many people's travels--I didn't end up using much of what I brought. I didn't touch the lace or the socks. I also didn't use many of the needles I brought (but I felt so secure having them with me!). I actually could have used one larger size set of needles than I had with me, but I also could have held off on casting on the oh-so-soft Malabrigo till I got home, but I wanted it for plane knitting.

Part of the reason I didn't get to much of the knitting is that I had ordered the yarn and pattern for the heart (see post below), and that took up a lot of my knitting time. I kind of forgot about that when taking into account how many projects I thought I'd need to keep me occupied.

The lace project was more about security. I had been working on it a lot before we left, and I thought I'd be sad if I had the time/urge to knit on it and it wasn't with me. Lace is so light, it was ok to throw in there. I'm a new lace knitter, so between the stress off events, the busy schedule, and having a 2-year old around all the time, I didn't have once second to do that kind of knitting.

Another reason I didn't get to all of the knitting is that I was lucky enough to get a little respite from husband care, and managed to get to 4 local yarn shops (Amazing Yarns in Emerald Hills, Full Thread Ahead in Los Altos, Green Planet Yarns in Campbell, Bobbin's Nest Studio in Santa Clara). I did a little stash enhancement at each of the stores. I also tried to go to Purlescence, but they were on vacation on the day I went, and I never made it back there, much to my regret. [off topic: I'm listening to Knitmore Girls' podcast, and Purlescence is their lys...I so regret not having gone back now!!]. I used the space bags to fit the yarn purchases into the baggage on the way home, and we ended up checking in 1 more bag on the way home (dh gets to check 2 bags automatically, so we didn't get charged).

Finally, the best reason that I didn't get to do as much knitting is that my earlier blog about hospital knitting let to a flurry of activity, and I put a chunk of my available time into trying to get that set up.

A chronological update for anyone interested:

7/14/08 The outline (my informal version of a proposal) went to Angela at the Stanford Guest Services.

7/16/08 We voted on a name: Healing Stitches

Approx. 7/18 or so: I set up a Google group (but only Beth Elliot joined it).

7/18: I got an update from Angela that she was working on seeing if the hospital wanted to start another program. She said she'd keep me posted.

7/22: Maggie from KnitWits@Stanford sent me an email telling me that she'd spoken to someone at the Cancer Center who's interested in Healing Stitches. Sorry Maggie, I can't believe that 10 days have passed and I haven't had a chance to email Holly. I promise to do it this weekend.

The Heart

Before we left for dh's surgery, I wanted to find something to knit for the surgeon as a thank you gift. What the heck to knit for a man in the middle of a California Summer? I searched ravelry.com for heart motif scarves. I repeat: in the middle of a California Summer? No. I searched for a heart pillow. Eureka! I found an anatomically correct heart pillow. I love Ravelry! It took me seconds to find out that the pattern was in the Winter 2006/2007 issue of "knit.1" Sigh, how am I going to find that?? I sent emails to a couple of lys owners whom I'd met. Voila! Allison @ Fibers Grass Valley had the mag, and was willing to pick out supplies needed and have the "kit" shipped to my sister's house where we'd be staying in California. How'd I find Fibers? I checked out an ad on ravelry, of course. Hey Allison, Jess & Casey--it works!!

Sorry, I digress.

I started working on the heart as soon as we arrived in California, just 4 days before dh's surgery. I really didn't get as much time to knit as I thought I would, since so much of my time was taken up with dh's surgery & recovery. And then the volunteer knitting inspiration that hit me when we were in the Pre-Op process (see the other entries). I finished the heart, and we presented it to Dr. Reitz & his nurse, Sophia Loo, the day before we came home. When we presented the Igloo cooler to the doctor, he said "They used to use these things for heart transplants. Now they use these Tupperware things--they're a little bigger." I had to laugh & told him he actually needed to open it. His initial reaction was "What's this?" They were pretty surprised by the heart. I'm sure they've never gotten one of those before! ....If you're wondering what the white part is on the aorta, that's my rendering of the dacron graft they used to repair dh's aneurysm. Sophia had described it as looking like "an off-white Slinky" (I asked!). It's i-cord, sewn on there in a spiral.

Sarah, who's writing the article about the inspiration, and our whole exerience at Stanford, asked what the size of a real heart is in comparison to the model. A real one is about 50% of the pillow size, but Dr. R. added, he has seen hearts that were that big before (enlarged heart = not a good thing).


Prelude to a heart:

Fibers forgot to wind the Cascade 220 into balls for me, so I enlisted dh (before the surgery, of course!) into being my swift while I balled the yarn. This is his yarn dance: